Mindset by Carol Dweck will transform your thinking. It will show how many times you gave up in life because of the fixed mindset.
The book is full of inspiring stories with thought provoking theories designed to improve your attitude in life.
I recommend this book for people looking for extraordinary growth in all areas of life. It’s one of my all time favorites. Below are my notes from the book.
đ Biggest lesson: your success depends on your mindset and you have full control of it.
Summary
Mindset is a book that explains the difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset.
Carol Dweck, a psychologist at Stanford University, describes the impact of having a fixed mindset versus a growth mindset.
The book is very easy to read and filled with great examples to explain the concepts.
Author | Carol Dweck |
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Publication year | 2006 |
Category | Psychology |
My rating | âď¸âď¸âď¸âď¸âď¸ |
Buy on Amazon | Kindle |
Notes & Quotes
Wasnât the IQ test meant to summarize childrenâs unchangeable intelligence? In fact, no. Binet, a Frenchman working in Paris in the early twentieth century, designed this test to identify children who were not profiting from the Paris public schools, so that new educational programs could be designed to get them back on track.
Or, as his forerunner Binet recognized, itâs not always the people who start out the smartest who end up the smartest.
For twenty years, my research has shown that the view you adopt for yourself profoundly affects the way you lead your life. It can determine whether you become the person you want to be and whether you accomplish the things you value.
Believing that your qualities are carved in stoneâthe fixed mindsetâcreates an urgency to prove yourself over and over.
This growth mindset is based on the belief that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your efforts. Although people may differ in every which wayâin their initial talents and aptitudes, interests, or temperamentsâeveryone can change and grow through application and experience.
Why waste time proving over and over how great you are, when you could be getting better? Why hide deficiencies instead of overcoming them?
âNothing ventured, nothing gainedâ and âIf at first you donât succeed, try, try againâ or âRome wasnât built in a day.â
We often see books with titles like The Ten Secrets of the Worldâs Most Successful People crowding the shelves of bookstores, and these books may give many useful tips. But theyâre usually a list of unconnected pointers, like âTake more risks!â or âBelieve in yourself!â While youâre left admiring people who can do that, itâs never clear how these things fit together or how you could ever become that way.
In fact, studies show that people are terrible at estimating their abilities.
Howard Gardner, in his book Extraordinary Minds, concluded that exceptional individuals have âa special talent for identifying their own strengths and weaknesses.â
When you enter a mindset, you enter a new world. In one worldâthe world of fixed traitsâsuccess is about proving youâre smart or talented. Validating yourself. In the otherâthe world of changing qualitiesâitâs about stretching yourself to learn something new. Developing yourself.
In one world, effort is a bad thing. It, like failure, means youâre not smart or talented. If you were, you wouldnât need effort. In the other world, effort is what makes you smart or talented.
You have a choice. Mindsets are just beliefs.
Benjamin Barber, an eminent sociologist, once said, âI donât divide the world into the weak and the strong, or the successes and the failures.⌠I divide the world into the learners and nonlearners.â
But for children with the growth mindset, success is about stretching themselves. Itâs about becoming smarter.One seventh-grade girl summed it up. âI think intelligence is something you have to work for ⌠it isnât just given to youâŚ
People with the growth mindset hoped for a different kind of partner. They said their ideal mate was someone who would: See their faults and help them to work on them. Challenge them to become a better person. Encourage them to learn new things.
People in a growth mindset donât just seek challenge, they thrive on it. The bigger the challenge, the more they stretch.
If you only go through life doing stuff thatâs easy, shame on you.
When do people with the fixed mindset thrive? When things are safely within their grasp. If things get too challengingâwhen theyâre not feeling smart or talentedâthey lose interest.
âThis is hard. This is fun.â Thatâs the moment I knew I was changing mindsets.
There was a saying in the 1960s that went: âBecoming is better than being.â The fixed mindset does not allow people the luxury of becoming. They have to already be.
As a New York Times article points out, failure has been transformed from an action (I failed) to an identity (I am a failure). This is especially true in the fixed mindset.
Even in the growth mindset, failure can be a painful experience. But it doesnât define you. Itâs a problem to be faced, dealt with, and learned from.
College students, after doing poorly on a test, were given a chance to look at tests of other students. Those in the growth mindset looked at the tests of people who had done far better than they had. As usual, they wanted to correct their deficiency. But students in the fixed mindset chose to look at the tests of people who had done really poorly. That was their way of feeling better about themselves.
John Wooden, the legendary basketball coach, says you arenât a failure until you start to blame. What he means is that you can still be in the process of learning from your mistakes until you deny them.
When people believe their basic qualities can be developed, failures may still hurt, but failures donât define them. And if abilities can be expandedâif change and growth are possibleâthen there are still many paths to success.
After all, everyone knows you have to show up in order to win.
Malcolm Gladwell, the author and New Yorker writer, has suggested that as a society we value natural, effortless accomplishment over achievement through effort. We endow our heroes with superhuman abilities that led them inevitably toward their greatness.
From the point of view of the fixed mindset, effort is only for people with deficiencies. And when people already know theyâre deficient, they have nothing to lose by trying.
Itâs also important to realize that even if people have a fixed mindset, theyâre not always in that mindset.
However, this point is crucial: The growth mindset does allow people to love what theyâre doingâand to continue to love it in the face of difficulties. The growth-minded athletes, CEOs, musicians, or scientists all loved what they did, whereas many of the fixed-minded ones did not.Many growth-minded people didnât even plan to go to the top. They got there as a result of doing what they love. Itâs ironic: The top is where the fixed-mindset people hunger to be, but itâs where many growth-minded people arrive as a by-product of their enthusiasm for what they do.
Incidentally, people with a growth mindset might also like a Nobel Prize or a lot of money. But they are not seeking it as a validation of their worth or as something that will make them better than others.
The growth mindset also doesnât mean everything that can be changed should be changed. We all need to accept some of our imperfections, especially the ones that donât really harm our lives or the lives of others.
People are all born with a love of learning, but the fixed mindset can undo it. Think of a time you were enjoying somethingâdoing a crossword puzzle, playing a sport, learning a new dance. Then it became hard and you wanted out. Maybe you suddenly felt tired, dizzy, bored, or hungry. Next time this happens, donât fool yourself. Itâs the fixed mindset. Put yourself in a growth mindset. Picture your brain forming new connections as you meet the challenge and learn. Keep on going.
Next time youâre tempted to surround yourself with worshipers, go to church. In the rest of your life, seek constructive criticism.
Yet Darwinâs masterwork, The Origin of Species, took years of teamwork in the field, hundreds of discussions with colleagues and mentors, several preliminary drafts, and half a lifetime of dedication before it reached fruition.Mozart labored for more than ten years until he produced any work that we admire today.
George Dantzig was a graduate student in math at Berkeley. One day, as usual, he rushed in late to his math class and quickly copied the two homework problems from the blackboard. When he later went to do them, he found them very difficult, and it took him several days of hard work to crack them open and solve them. They turned out not to be homework problems at all. They were two famous math problems that had never been solved.
Remember, test scores and measures of achievement tell you where a student is, but they donât tell you where a student could end up.
The fixed mindset limits achievement.
Twyla Tharp, the world-famous choreographer and dancer, wrote a book called The Creative Habit.
So telling children theyâre smart, in the end, made them feel dumber and act dumber, but claim they were smarter. I donât think this is what weâre aiming for when we put positive labelsââgifted,â âtalented,â âbrilliantââon people. We donât mean to rob them of their zest for challenge and their recipes for success.
Research by Claude Steele and Joshua Aronson shows that even checking a box to indicate your race or sex can trigger the stereotype in your mind and lower your test score. Almost anything that reminds you that youâre black or female before taking a test in the subject youâre supposed to be bad at will lower your test scoreâa lot.
Aside from hijacking peopleâs abilities, stereotypes also do damage by making people feel they donât belong. Many minorities drop out of college and many women drop out of math and science because they just donât feel they fit in.
In short, the growth mindset lets peopleâeven those who are targets of negative labelsâuse and develop their minds fully.
Think about your hero. Do you think of this person as someone with extraordinary abilities who achieved with little effort? Now go find out the truth. Find out the tremendous effort that went into their accomplishmentâand admire them more.
Think of times other people outdid you and you just assumed they were smarter or more talented. Now consider the idea that they just used better strategies, taught themselves more, practiced harder, and worked their way through obstacles. You can do that, too, if you want to.
Aliâs victory over Liston is boxing history. A famous boxing manager reflects on Ali: âHe was a paradox. His physical performances in the ring were absolutely wrong.⌠Yet, his brain was always in perfect working condition.â âHe showed us all,â he continued with a broad smile written across his face, âthat all victories come from here,â hitting his forehead with his index finger. Then he raised a pair of fists, saying: âNot from here.â
Michael Jordan wasnât a natural, either. He was the hardest-working athlete, perhaps in the history of sport.It is well known that Michael Jordan was cut from the high school varsity teamâwe laugh at the coach who cut him. He wasnât recruited by the college he wanted to play for (North Carolina State). Well, werenât they foolish? He wasnât drafted by the first two NBA teams that could have chosen him. What a blooper! Because now we know he was the greatest basketball player ever, and we think it should have been obvious from the start. When we look at him we see MICHAEL JORDAN. But at that point he was only Michael Jordan.
Former Bulls assistant coach John Bach called him âa genius who constantly wants to upgrade his genius.â
But, as Billie Jean King tells us, the mark of a champion is the ability to win when things are not quite rightâwhen youâre not playing well and your emotions are not the right ones. Hereâs how she learned what being a champion meant.
All at once, she understood what a champion was: someone who could raise their level of play when they needed to. When the match is on the line, they suddenly âget around three times tougher.â
Character is what allows you to reach the top and stay there.
Mia Hamm tells us, âAfter every game or practice, if you walk off the field knowing that you gave everything you had, you will always be a winner.â
âSome people donât want to rehearse; they just want to perform. Other people want to practice a hundred times first. Iâm in the former group.â
Those with the growth mindset found setbacks motivating. Theyâre informative. Theyâre a wake-up call.
âIâve missed more than nine thousand shots. Iâve lost almost three hundred games. Twenty-six times, Iâve been trusted to take the game-winning shot, and missed.â
A superstarâs talent can win games, but itâs teamwork that wins championships.
Worrying about being a nobody is not the mindset that motivates and sustains champions.
âIf you work hard at something, you get out what you put in.â
Itâs what makes great athletes and itâs what comes from the growth mindset with its focus on self-development, self-motivation, and responsibility.
We know from our studies that people with the fixed mindset do not admit and correct their deficiencies.
When bosses become controlling and abusive, they put everyone into a fixed mindset.
Real self-confidence is not reflected in a title, an expensive suit, a fancy car, or a series of acquisitions. It is reflected in your mindset: your readiness to grow.
In the early 1970s, Irving Janis popularized the term groupthink. Itâs when everyone in a group starts thinking alike. No one disagrees. No one takes a critical stance.
Groupthink can occur when people put unlimited faith in a talented leader, a genius.
Groupthink can happen when the group gets carried away with its brilliance and superiority. At Enron, the executives believed that because they were brilliant, all of their ideas were brilliant. Nothing would ever go wrong. An outside consultant kept asking Enron people, âWhere do you think youâre vulnerable?â Nobody answered him. Nobody even understood the question.
Managers with a growth mindset think itâs nice to have talent, but thatâs just the starting point. These managers are more committed to their employeesâ development, and to their own.
Most exciting, the growth mindset can be taught to managers.
Finally, it means creating a growth-mindset environment in which people can thrive. This involves:
- Presenting skills as learnable
- Conveying that the organization values learning and perseverance, not just ready-made genius or talent
- Giving feedback in a way that promotes learning and future success
- Presenting managers as resources for learning
It had to be a person with the fixed mindset who coined the phrase âRevenge is sweetââthe idea that with revenge comes your redemptionâbecause people with the growth mindset have little taste for it.
For people with the growth mindset, the number one goal was forgiveness.
âIâll be damned if Iâm going to sit here and feel sorry for myself!â
One problem is that people with the fixed mindset expect everything good to happen automatically.
Itâs probably why so many relationships go staleâbecause people believe that being in love means never having to do anything taxing.
Part of the low-effort belief is the idea that couples should be able to read each otherâs minds: We are like one. My partner should know what I think, feel, and need and I should know what my partner thinks, feels, and needs. But this is impossible.
John Gottman reports: âIâve interviewed newlywed men who told me with pride, âIâm not going to wash the dishes, no way. Thatâs a womanâs job.â Two years later the same guys ask me, âWhy donât my wife and I have sex anymore?â â
It doesnât mean there is no âthey lived happily ever after,â but itâs more like âthey worked happily ever after.â
Relationship expert Daniel Wile says that choosing a partner is choosing a set of problems. There are no problem-free candidates. The trick is to acknowledge each otherâs limitations, and build from there.
Aaron Beck tells couples in counseling never to think these fixed-mindset thoughts: My partner is incapable of change. Nothing can improve our relationship.
Praising childrenâs intelligence harms their motivation and it harms their performance.
If success means theyâre smart, then failure means theyâre dumb. Thatâs the fixed mindset.
Parents think they can hand children permanent confidenceâlike a giftâby praising their brains and talent. It doesnât work, and in fact has the opposite effect.
We can praise them as much as we want for the growth-oriented processâwhat they accomplished through practice, study, persistence, and good strategies.
Everyone learns in a different way. Letâs keep trying to find the way that works for you.
Skills and achievement come through commitment and effort.
Donât judge. Teach. Itâs a learning process.
Many educators think that lowering their standards will give students success experiences, boost their self-esteem, and raise their achievement. It comes from the same philosophy as the overpraising of studentsâ intelligence. Well, it doesnât work.
Welcome to success. You will read hard books in here and understand what you read. You will write every day.⌠But you must help me to help you. If you donât give anything, donât expect anything. Success is not coming to you, you must come to it.
Every day he tells his students that he is no smarter than they areâjust more experienced.
But when students understand that school is for themâa way for them to grow their mindsâthey do not insist on sabotaging themselves. In my work, I have seen tough guys shed tears when they realize they can become smarter.
Sometimes I donât like other grown-ups very much because they think they know everything. I donât know everything. I can learn all the time.
You have to apply yourself each day to becoming a little better. By applying yourself to the task of becoming a little better each and every day over a period of time, you will become a lot better.
Remember that praising childrenâs intelligence or talent, tempting as it is, sends a fixed-mindset message.
As parents, teachers, and coaches, our mission is developing peopleâs potential. Letâs use all the lessons of the growth mindsetâand whatever else we canâto do this.
In the 1960s, psychiatrist Aaron Beck was working with his clients when he suddenly realized it was their beliefs that were causing their problems. Just before they felt a wave of anxiety or depression, something quickly flashed through their minds. It could be: âDr. Beck thinks Iâm incompetent.â
Whether theyâre aware of it or not, all people keep a running account of whatâs happening to them, what it means, and what they should do. In other words, our minds are constantly monitoring and interpreting.
Just learning about the growth mindset can cause a big shift in the way people think about themselves and their lives.
But change is also hard.When people hold on to a fixed mindset, itâs often for a reason. At some point in their lives it served a good purpose for them. It told them who they were or who they wanted to be (a smart, talented child) and it told them how to be that (perform well). In this way, it provided a formula for self-esteem and a path to love and respect from others.
But opening yourself up to growth makes you more yourself, not less.
What works is making a vivid, concrete plan: âTomorrow during my break, Iâll get a cup of tea, close the door to my office, and call the graduate school.â Or, in another case: âOn Wednesday morning, right after I get up and brush my teeth, Iâll sit at my desk and start writing my report.â
Think of something you need to do, something you want to learn, or a problem you have to confront. What is it? Now make a concrete plan. When will you follow through on your plan? Where will you do it? How will you do it? Think about it in vivid detail.
The critical thing is to make a concrete, growth-oriented plan, and to stick to it.
Many people with the fixed mindset think the world needs to change, not them. They feel entitled to something betterâa better job, house, or spouse.
Itâs a long time before you begin to enjoy putting in effort and a long time before you begin to think in terms of learning.
Studying now has a new meaning. It isnât about getting the highest grade to prove her intelligence and worth to her parents. Itâs about learning things and thinking about them in interesting ways.
Itâs a learning processânot a battle between the bad you and the good you.
First, spouses canât read your mind, so when an anger-provoking situation arises, you have to matter-of-factly tell them how it makes you feel.
When peopleâcouples, coaches and athletes, managers and workers, parents and children, teachers and studentsâchange to a growth mindset, they change from a judge-and-be-judged framework to a learn-and-help-learn framework.
Every day presents you with ways to grow and to help the people you care about grow.
Remember, as Alex Rodriguez, the great baseball player, said: âYou either go one way or the other.â You might as well be the one deciding the direction.